“The greatest gift a father can give to his children is to love their mother.”—Unknown
Marriage
There was a very unusual military funeral in California in December of 2013. Sgt. First Class Joseph Gantt, who fought in both World War II and the Korean War, was laid to rest. He had been captured in Korea in 1950 and died the following year. But his body was not returned for many years, and his death was never confirmed by the North Koreans.
At Sunday school they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam’s ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, “Johnny, what’s the matter?”
Johnny said, “I don’t feel well, I think I’m having a wife.”
Source: Unknown
One-third (35 percent) of Americans today say they have been through a breakup at least once in the past 10 years.
Americans under age 35 are twice as likely as those between 35 and 54, and nearly five times as likely as those 55 and older, to have split with a significant other in the past decade. In fact, 59 percent of respondents between the ages of 18 and 34 say they have recently experienced a breakup.
Although half of women (51 percent) say they initiated their most recent split, only 32 percent of men say their partner dumped them.
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When a couple asked a pastor if he would perform their marriage ceremony, he proceeded to tell them that he likes to give several sessions of premarital counseling before performing weddings. To which they replied, “We don’t need counseling. We’ve both been married several times before.”
Source: Reader’s Digest, May, 2009
The pastor and his wife knew they had made a mistake by agreeing to counsel with Mrs. Smith when she opened their first session by saying, “I want to thank you for seeing me, especially since my husband said he’d kill anybody that I talked to about our problems.”
Source: Unknown
There is an old story that illustrates the principle of honor within marriage. A drunkard husband, spending the evening with his jovial companions at a tavern, boasted that if he took a group of his friends home with him at midnight and asked his Christian wife to get up and cook supper for them, she would do it without complaint. The crowd considered it a vain boast and dared him to try it. So the drunken crowd followed him home, and he made the unreasonable demands of his wife.
Samuel Clemens, more commonly known by his pen name, Mark Twain was a gifted writer. Yet Twain held a deep contempt for Christianity. He once referred to it as a “slaughterhouse religion” because of the doctrine of the blood atonement, and he often turned his ridicule on those who believed the Bible. He met and fell in love with Olivia Langdon, a young woman from a good Christian family. While they were courting he appeared to have downplayed his lack of faith, and she agreed to marry him.
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A lady in Spain made the news when she chose a unique way to test her husband’s love. With the help of a friend, she manipulated her own kidnapping and sent a ransom notice to her husband. When the police discovered the kidnapping was a hoax, they asked the lady why she did it. “I wanted to find out what my husband would do for me,” she replied.
Source: AFP News
1. Don’t
buy clothing that involves sizes. The chances are one in seven thousand that
you will get her size right, and your wife will be offended the other 6999
times.
2. Avoid all things useful. The new silver polish advertised to save hundreds
of hours is not going to win you any brownie points.
3. Don’t buy jewelry. The jewelry your wife wants, you can’t afford. And the jewelry
you can afford, she doesn’t want.
I once read the story of a young woman who wanted to go to college, but her heart sank when she read the question on the application that asked, “Are you a leader?” Being both honest and conscientious, she wrote, “No,” and returned the application, expecting the worst. To her surprise, she received this letter from the college: “Dear Applicant: A study of the application forms reveals that this year our college will have 1,452 new leaders. We are accepting you because we feel it is imperative that they have at least one follower.”
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A married couple had a quarrel and ended up giving each other the silent treatment. Two days into their mute argument, the man realized he needed his wife’s help. In order to catch a flight to Chicago for a business meeting, he had to get up at 5 a.m.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence, he wrote on a piece of paper, “Please wake me at 5 a.m.”
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After bringing their first baby home from the hospital, the wife suggested to her husband that he try his hand at changing diapers. “I’m busy,” he said. “I’ll do the next one.”
The next time the baby was wet, she asked if he was ready to learn how to change diapers. He gave her a puzzled look, then said finally, “I didn’t mean the next diaper; I meant the next baby!”
Source: Unknown
In 2005, the Guinness Book of World Records said that Percy and Florence Arrowsmith held two records—the longest marriage of a living couple (80 years) and having the largest married couple’s aggregate age (205 years).
Both Mr. and Mrs. Arrowsmith have since died, but they left good advice for those who want to have a lasting marriage. Florence said, “You must never go to sleep bad friends. If you’ve had a quarrel, you make it up. Never be afraid to say, ‘sorry’.”
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When Mr. and Mrs. Henry Ford celebrated their golden wedding anniversary, a reporter asked them, “To what do you attribute your fifty years of successful married life?”
“The formula,” said Mr. Ford, “is the same formula I have always used in making cars—just stick to one model.”
Source: Walking Through Your Bible with H.M.S. Richards, H.M.S. Richards
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A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counseling came up. “Oh, well never need that. My wife and I have a great relationship,” the husband explained. “She was a communications major in college and I majored in theatre arts.” He continued, “She communicates well, and I act like I’m listening.”
Source: Unknown
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In 2002, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention released a report based on a nationwide survey of 10,847 women. They found that twenty percent of first marriages end in divorce or separation within five years while forty-nine percent of premarital cohabitation relationships end within that same time frame. When these time frames are extended to ten years sixty-two percent of cohabitation relationships breakup, while just thirty-three percent of first marriages end.
Source: CDC Press Release, July 24, 2002
“A wife or husband may remain faithful and may give evidence of careful attention in matters pertaining to each other, and yet there may be a decline in first love. Similarly, a church member may be very regular in his attendance at the services, but no amount of activity, however intense, can compensate for a lack of love.”—Lehman Strauss
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Sitting in the stands at a baseball game, a lady critic yelled, “Ump, if I was your wife, I’d feed you poison.” This was all the baseball umpire could stomach. Glaring back, he shouted, “And if I were your husband, I’d take it!”