Easter

The resurrection of Jesus is central to the celebration of Easter, but less than half of adult Americans link the two. The Barna Group found that only 42% of adults tied Easter to the Resurrection. Adults between the ages of 18 and 25 did the worst. David Kinnaman, president of the Barna Group, said, “The Easter holiday in particular still has a distinctly religious connection for people, but the specifics of it are really fading in a lot of people’s minds.”

Source: The Houston Chronicle, March 18, 2010

When Sir Michael Faraday (a great scientist from the 1800s), was dying, some journalists questioned him about his speculations for a life after death. “Speculations!” he said, “I know nothing about speculations. I’m resting on certainties. I know that my Redeemer liveth, and because He lives, I shall live also.”

Source: The Speaker’s Quote Book, Roy B. Zuck

A little boy was sick on Palm Sunday and stayed home from church with his mother. His father returned from church holding a palm branch. The little boy was curious and asked, “Why do you have that palm branch, Dad?”

“You see, when Jesus came into town, everyone waved palm branches to honor Him, so we got palm branches today.”

The little boy replied, “The only Sunday I miss is the Sunday that Jesus shows up!”

Source: Unknown

As a man was driving his children to church on Easter Sunday, he was trying to explain that Easter was when we celebrate Jesus raising from the dead. From the back seat his three-year-old piped up, "Will He be in church today?"

Source: Unknown

On February 27, 1991, during the Desert Storm War, a woman by the name of Ruth Dillow received the worst call of her life. Her son, Clayton Carpenter, Private First Class, had stepped on a land mine and was dead. For the next three days she grieved. No one could comfort her.

On the third day after receiving the terrible news, the phone rang. On the other end of the phone there was a voice that said, “Mom, it’s me. I’m alive.” At first she thought it was a cruel joke, but as the conversation continued, she realized it was her son.

Three-year-old Shawn accompanied his dad to church on Easter. The father wanted his son to understand the meaning of Easter, so he tried to explain the significance of the cross which hung at the front of the church. He said, “Jesus died because people nailed him to the cross.” The little boy’s eyes widened as he scanned the church. He asked his dad, “You mean these people?”

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.—Isaiah 53:5

The life of our Lord is marked by the virgin's womb, and the empty tomb. He came into the world through a door marked “No Entrance" and left through one marked "No Exit!”

Source: Unknown

The pyramids of Egypt are famous because they contained the mummified bodies of ancient Egyptian kings. Westminster Abbey in London is renowned, because in it rests the bodies of English nobles and notables. Mohammad's tomb is noted for the stone coffin and the bones it contains. The Taj Majal was built as a memorial to a wife of one of India’s Shahs. Arlington cemetery in Washington, D.C., is revered, for it is the honored resting place of many outstanding Americans. The garden tomb of Jesus is famous not because of what is inside, but because it is empty!

A woman wrote J. Vernon McGee, “Our preacher said that on Easter Jesus just swooned on the cross, and the disciples nursed him back to health. What do you think?”

McGee replied, “Dear Sister, beat your preacher with a leather whip for thirty-nine heavy strokes. Nail him to a cross. Hang him in the sun for six hours. Run a spear through his heart. Embalm him. Put him in an airless tomb for three days. Then see what happens.”—Source Unknown

Cots can be made available for those who say Sunday is their only day to sleep.

Eye drops can be supplied for those who have red eyes from watching late Saturday night TV shows.

Steel helmets can be provided for those who say the roof would cave in if they ever went to church, blankets for people who think the church is too cold, fans for those who say it is too hot, scorecards for those wishing to list all the hypocrites present, TV dinners for those who can’t go to church and also cook dinner.

Harriet Frye watched as her four-year-old granddaughter handed a small Easter basket of candy eggs to her grandfather. Crystal then climbed up into her grandpa’s lap, looked into his eyes, and very seriously said, “Friends share.”

Source: The Best of Grandparents' Brag Board, Pregel and Riley

There were four country churches in a small Texas town: The Presbyterian church, the Baptist church, the Methodist church, and the Catholic church. Each church was overrun with pesky squirrels.

One day,the Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about the squirrels.

After much prayer and consideration they determined that the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.

The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no recognized days for their religion as other religions did. 
The case was brought before a judge. 
After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge
 banged his gavel declaring, “Case dismissed.'
” The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling saying, “Your 
honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? 
The Christians have Christmas, Easter, etc.

A Sunday school teacher asked each member of her class to write one sentence on “What Easter Means to Me.” One pupil wrote: “Egg salad sandwiches for the next two weeks!”

Source Unknown

I heard of a man who attended church one week and become increasingly agitated with the message. On the way out he stopped to speak to the Pastor. He said, “You really have to do something about your sermons. You speak about the same topic every time I am here.” The preacher said, “You only come on Easter Sunday.”—Source Unknown

One year when Christmas Day fell on a Sunday, a farmer decided to go to church. (Like some people, he thought he was fulfilling his religious obligation by going to church twice a year—at Christmas and Easter!) The sermon that day was preached from the text, “The ox knoweth his owner, and the ass his master's crib: but Israel doth not know, my people doth not consider” (Is. 1:3). Isaiah is saying that man is dumber than the animals. After church the farmer returned home and stood among his cows.

It was Easter Sunday, 1973. Uganda groaned under the terror of Idi Amin. Still fresh in young Pastor Kefa Sempangi’s memory was a face burned beyond recognition, the sight of soldiers cruelly beating a man, and the horrible sound of boots crushing bones—all for the crime of being a Christian. But Easter of 1973 Pastor Sempangi bravely and openly preached on the risen Lord in his town’s football stadium to over 7,000 people. After the service, five of Idi Amin’s Secret Police followed Sempangi back to his church and closed the door behind them.

A young man came to his boss and asked for the day off to attend his grandmother's funeral. His boss said, “Sure.”

The next day the young man was talking to his boss. The boss said, “Do you believe in resurrection from the dead?”  

Young man, “Yes.” 

“Interesting, because after you left work yesterday, your grandmother came to visit you!”—Source Unknown

The tomb could hold Him no longer;
Death is strong, but life is stronger.
Stronger than the dark—the light.
Stronger than the wrong—the right.
Faith and hope triumphant say,
“Christ arose on Resurrection Day!”—Source Unknown

McKenzie wasn’t trying to start a theological debate, she just wanted to make a point about Jesus’ resurrection. Her Sunday school teacher had tried to encourage her class with the assurance that Jesus is everywhere. But for McKenzie, that didn’t sound right. So she said, “I know one place where Jesus isn’t.” The teacher curiously replied, “Oh, really? Where is that?”